Bella...that's me!

I came all the way from the Caribbean to get a tan. Italy is hot. Despite my best efforts to look like I just walked out of my room all day, I was a hot tourist reaching for the euros to buy some water, slushies, gelato or soda. And I went playing farse, in this heat and decided I had to go to the Piazza de Michelangelo. I advise you Google this wonder to fully grasp the agony. No amount of time in the gym could have prepared anyone for this new form of torture as this sun blazed down upon the innocent.

The first half of the day went nicely, with a day spent in the Galleria degli Uffizi, art and history whore that I am. I am having a lovely time, in my little sun dress, enjoying a beautiful, albeit hot city, with a myriad of characters. Last evening, while sitting on the steps of the Duomo, I met Francesco, clearly alone and needy, who after 15 minutes of stilted conversation - his broken English and my zero Italian - invited me to dinner, at his house!!!! I told him I would meet him this evening instead at 8.00pm. It is now 7.49pm and I am in the hotel, with zero intention of walking back to the Duomo or anywhere but my room. Poor fella. I hope he does not wait around too long, but when your teeth are screaming for you to stop drinking coffee, smoking and to find a dentist, you have zero chance of making a good impression. Take a hint, boys.

The other admirers have been various flavours of odd and of course since I am black, I can only be from Africa since nowhere else in the world has black people. Steups.But they have not been grabbish or rude. Just full of admiration, maybe lust and curiousity.

I did meet a very nice lady from Paraguay while wasting away in the museum line this morning. When she asked where I was from and I was trying to decide whether to say Africa or Trinidad, I decided to go for gold and say Trinidad cause clearly I was meant to educate the world about the Caribbean. Instead, before I realised she was from Paraguay of course, she was like, "Oh Trinidad and Tobago!!!"

Friend for life!!!!

Thank God for CXC Spanish cause we managed to have quite a nice conversation in the end. She has been living in Italy for 21 years and was only doing the tourist thing cause her brother was visiting from Paraguay.

I also witnessed a police chase in the square as immigrants went pelting down the street, followed closely by il polizia in their skin tight pants. I was more anxious to see some ripped seams than captured Africans and Arabs.

And I think all the food I ate between last night and 5 minutes ago has been effectively burnt off from walking across the length and breadth of this city, which every guide book and the 2 Italians I spoke to, referred to as SMALL. lol. My feet are crying for justice. The food. How do people stay slim here? I have been trying it all and loving it all and tomorrow I will have more and tell you more about my waistline and my bliss.

Tomorrow, I don my yellow sundress and head to Tuscany, where hopefully my sugar daddy hunt will be more Diane Lane and less...well...less Francesco. Oh the excitement of my life!

I will do proper travel reviews when I have more time but right now my feet are as black as my flip flops from Vespa dust, and trudging up steep slopes. Ciao!