Love is the Greatest Adventure - TW Wed-Zine 2015

Behind the scenes of the TW Wed-Zine photo shoot
Photo credit: Antony Scully

So have you started planning your wedding?

More than half of single women have already planned their wedding before they have found a groom...
Millions of women still looking for 'Mr Right' have researched elements churches, flowers, reception venues, bridesmaids dresses and the car which will take them to the church.
...nearly two thirds of single females have planned their wedding day since they were a child.
And 34 per cent of unspoken-for women regularly browse the web for inspiration on flowers, dresses and elaborate venues.

- Findings of an Interflora survey in the UK, as reported by The Telegraph.

As a single gal, I can attest to this, and unashamedly. A woman's wedding day is something that has its genesis from perhaps as early as when she got her first doll. Whether it is a lavish 600 guests-strong affair, a simple beach wedding, a subdued civil ceremony or an intimate destination wedding, a woman's special day is something she has been planning in one form or another, for years.

When the question has finally been popped, the real work begins - taking the childhood dream from an idea to reality. A lot of times, the dream has been formed through media experiences - what a girl sees on tv, or in the movies, or in glossy foreign magazines. For local couples though, the search for ideas, concepts and recommendations is much closer than they think.

Trinidad Weddings has just released its latest issue of its increasingly popular TW Wed-Zine - a top resource for brides- and grooms-to-be (yes, grooms plan too), and is an official how-to, go-to, what-to for weddings in 2015. Also popular among wedding vendors, planners and students, the TW Wed-Zine is not only a great resource, but it is a locally produced resource and one that is of an exceptional standard.

TW Wed Zine 2015

TW Wed Zine 2015

The beautiful brides of the TW Wed Zine 2015 cover
Photo Credit: Aarti Gosine

I love that one gets a full feel of what a wedding can be - from the international trends to what can be delivered locally from industry experts. Editor and founder, Simone Sant-Ghuran launched the 2015 magazine recently at ZaZou Bistro Moderne at the Trinidad Country Club, which in my estimation, oozes love and romance so it was a perfect venue to talk love, marriage...

...and adventure.

This year, the magazine’s theme of “Love is The Greatest Adventure” ties in with an emphasis on outdoor weddings. This issue features several take-your-breath-away love stories from deep in Tobago’s mangrove, a Port of Spain hill top, a rustic log cabin, the Temple By The Sea at sunset, the Wild Fowl Trust, a residential garden and even, the first Catholic wedding held “down the islands.”

TW Wed-Zine Founder and Editor, Simone Sant-Ghuran at the mag launch at ZaZou Bistro
Beautiful dress by CLD - Charu Lochan Dass and accessories by Rachel Rochford

Roses and chocolate at the mag launch - what says love better?
Flowers provided by Latitude 0 and Floral Artistry by Flowers to Treasure
Chocolate Tarts provided by the awesome team at ZaZou Bistro Moderne

Weddings are not all cut from the same cloth and the magazine recognises that couples all want something unique to them. The assortment of wedding stories and ideas can only help the excited lovebirds to refine what they want out of their big day - or at least one hopes, if they are not like me - always overly excited about the choices available.

But it is a must-buy I think. I don't know of anyone who has been married, who has planned their wedding, and who has not referred to someone or something to bring their wedding dream to reality. Love is an adventure and planning a wedding should be an adventure - a good one. There was one day in London, a friend decided she just wanted to go try on wedding dresses. Neither of us were engaged - hell, neither of us were dating. But it was great fun telling the salesgirls about the dream wedding neither of us were having - at the time, But hope for the day is alive. Every girl has that dream wedding in their minds, and I think TW Wed-Zine is an amazing ride for those chasing the dream.

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• This year, readers anywhere in the world can also purchase a hardcopy if they wish. Both the digital and hardcopy versions can be purchased HERE.
• The TW Wed-Zine is sold at 30 retailers throughout Trinidad and Tobago
• For more visit the website - www.trinidadweddings.com 
• Check out the behind the scenes video for the Love is the Greatest Adventure themed cover below.

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It's so hard to say Goodbye when you only just said Hello

I had a completely different post planned for today. You don't wake up expecting to have to write something like this.

In 2013, I visited Rome - a city I had always wanted to see. One of the most exciting things about that trip was meeting up with my childhood penpal for the first time ever. I wrote about the anticipation here and about the actual meeting here.

When I returned home, we gushed about our trip. Later...she told me she was sick. Cancer - that awful, awful scourge that has covered this world with such a darkness and a mercilessness. She was upbeat, she was positive. We traded messages, I prayed, we made plans. The last conversation she had, she told me she did not have good news. But she was trying her best, she said. She sent me a happy smiley but I am sure she was in so much pain. I sent her one back. The worst thing about having friends so far away is that you cannot hold their hand or hug them. A happy smiley and my thoughts and prayers were all I had to offer. I messaged her after that and got no response. This morning, it dawned on me that I had not checked in on her in a little while. I checked on my last message and saw that it had never been read. I went to her page and I speak no Italian but I did not need to understand the language to understand the story being told through the photos, the messages, the tags.

She was without a doubt the highlight of that trip. When we met, it was like we were friends for years and years, even though we were in a way. She opened her heart to me, her friends, her city. The warmth and beauty of her soul were so genuine in a city that at times felt so cold. It did not matter that I was black or a foreigner or whatever - we were friends when we were 11, and here we were in our 30s - friends then and forever.

I still have the first photo she ever sent me so many years ago in an envelope stamped 'Roma'. She, leaning against a wall, in an oversized sweater, long brown hair over her shoulder, pretty smile. She was happy to make friends from an island so far away and we were so much alike even though we were so different,

She was so young. She was my age. But while I cannot speak to how many lives she touched, she certainly touched mine. I am so glad we got to meet and even though it was a short moment in time, it was a memorable and beautiful moment.Our next rendez-vous was to be in Trinidad. We had talked about this. I looked at the screen this morning and I just cried. She was as good a friend as any I see every day. When I had joys to share, I shared them with her. When I was cold and lonely in London, she always made me laugh. I am heartbroken. We will never make that trip to Cuba together now, but I promise to live each day with hope the way she always told me to. Life is so short and it is not fair.

The hardest part is I did not even know until this morning. That is eating me alive. My heart was heavy and so I checked and checked and checked - going crazy with checking messages, sending messages to her friends, trying to translate messages into English, and forcing myself to think positively when deep down, with every post I tried to translate, every post that was not hers, every throwback photo, I knew otherwise.

Farewell, my lovely, my beautiful friend - both inside and out. Thank you for loving me despite boundaries. Thank you for being the light that you were. Thank you for living a life worthy of the love you have received. Thank you for once again reminding me to Live, Love, Laugh. I will hold you in my heart forever.

Grazie. Sleep well.

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Reminders and Lessons from this week

I was reminded that coffee is a mask used to cover deeper problems and all coffee addiction jokes aside, I need to start listening to my body when it screams "I am tired".

After having weirdo things happen to my body, and banning coffee from my morning breakfasts for a few days, I was reminded that I could not deny that my fatigue was not normal.

I  was not reminded, but learnt that IV fluid bags take a long, long time to empty into one's body. This is especially not good when one is hungry and there is nothing at all to eat. I learnt this from having said bag attached to my arm - not a fun lesson.

I was reminded that sick days were invented for a reason. I must exercise this franchise more often when it is necessary.

I was reminded that I am not close to being invincible. I have fears like anyone else.

I was reminded that the internet is not always your friend when you start playing doctor and trying to diagnose yourself.

I was reminded that a second opinion really contributes to peace of mind.

I learnt that I have in fact lost 13 pounds. This was a great lesson cause I had banned myself from getting on the scale again until I felt for sure that weight loss was happening. I did not think anything was happening and when the doctor forced me to get on that evil device this morning, I cringed before I looked down. But small yaaay....13 gone, 500 to go!!

I was reminded that small victories often justify small treats. Very small. Don't judge me. I had a tough week!

Hazelnut Mocha cupcake. So cute. So yummy.

I was reminded that life is more than the day-to-day routine and hustle. It is soooo fragile and so much more than we make it each day. I was reminded that I have to take better care of myself and to embrace life more than I do. I need reminding of this often.

I was reminded that I am loved and that I love in return. Thanks for all the well wishes.

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ABC's Scandal: Fixing the Tragic Life of Singles

Single politician Will Caldwell
and his fixee on ABC's Scandal
Photo credit: Danny Feld/ABC

So like a lot of people nowadays, I sat down with a wafer after Grey's Anatomy, and watched ABC's Scandal. While I am not about to start any arguments about the show, I do want to comment on one thing.

So one of the sub-plots last night was around a Kennedy-esque type candidate for Governor. A driven and committed guy, from the right family background, with the media darling looks. Only one problem - he's single!

So I chuckled throughout the storyline.

1. He's educated, rich, good looking, from one of those families you apparently want to marry into, but the only thing WRONG with him, is he is single. lol. Referring to yesterday's blog post, he is a male leftover, and in political circles, that is a sin! While it was good to see the single man getting abused last night, I am still in the corner of all single people, advocating that it is not a tragedy! Is it??

2. So he's educated, rich, good looking etc, with no wife, no girlfriend, no signs of a woman anywhere - just single and moving along with his little politics hobby, so guess what? He MUST be gay! Yep. Single and with no obvious signs of a relationship, so clearly, you're gay and in the closet. This is real though. This does not only play out on tv! Turns out the guy was not gay but instead just creeping with his sister-in-law for the past decade.

3. Olivia insists that if given ten years, she can get a gay president elected. A gay president with a partner! But not a SINGLE president - gay or otherwise. ROFL. I mean, is there no hope for the singleton?

In the end, things were so bad for this very openly single dude, that they resorted to finding him a fake wife. Yes...a fake wife! So not only does Olivia Pope fix political messes, but she fixes the tragic life of the singleton. The DC matchmaker if you will.

Do you need an Olivia Pope for your tragic single life?

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Find God's Match For You

Christian love. All kinda love.

So when I see this Christian Mingle ad, I always have a laugh. The people who came up with this marketing campaign are pretty bold, pretty out there. To confidently promote this online dating service for Christians, with the tagline – Find God’s match for you – well, that takes some balls.

It always conjures up this image of God relaxing on the patio, in his robe and warm slippers, with a cappuccino, maybe a croissant or a Danish, maybe a cigar (hey, they started it), with his iPad or Galaxy Tab, going through his list of Christians looking for love and matching Joe with Jill, Brad with Melanie – all before he gets to the real work of blessing people, curing the sick, etc.

I mean – seriously, people. Find God’s match for you? Who came up with this? Who approved this marketing campaign?

I am curious as to the algorithm that matches the ones seeking love on this site. I mean, did an Archbishop somewhere get a memo from God which he then shared with IT developers? What if the love-seeker is not a Christian? Does the person get zapped while trying to sign up?

God's message in your inbox?

I have absolutely no problem with a niche-specific dating site – black singles, gay singles, Caribbean singles, etc. You want what you want, and if you can trim the fat and get to the meat of the matter, right down to brass tax, right down to your target niche, whether it is a black guy, Caribbean girl or Christian single, then great. However, I just found the advertising for this to be a bit ludicrous. Find God’s match for you. I wonder if they got God’s okay to use his name in these ads! It’s almost as stupid as God’s and Jesus’ Facebook and Twitter profiles. Who does these things?

But more importantly, and for all the non-Christian minglers out there - does this mean that Match and e-Harmony are the other guy’s sites? I mean, as if dating was not traumatic enough!

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Call Me...Maybe: Dating has gone Beserk

Forza Italia! Forza Azzurri!

Of course it is football time in Trininista land (where we do NOT say "soccer") with the European Cup, or Euro 2012, on.

These are the times a girl - well, this girl - looks forward to in life. Being a long time fan of the Azzurri, and for the non-footballing heathens, that's the Italy national squad, I will be plotting some sort of plan to be able to see that do-or-die game tomorrow, as I sit in a meeting for 3 hours!!!

But in other more disturbing news, and I felt I needed to bring this to the fore...the Call Me Maybe card.

The Call Me Maybe Card - sad

Isn't this a tad bit desperate? On the flip side, one may say this is ingenious and proactive. But I am not sure how I would react if some guy came up to me in a bar and gave me one of these. It is too obvious and too orchestrated. This guy is walking around my bar, with a card holder full of these things. Is he just passing them out like candy to anything female that moves? Am I supposed to feel special after receiving one of these ? Then he has his Facebook page listed - maybe with all his glamour shots, and what else? Testimonials? What's wrong with saying hello? Okay, maybe the girl will roll her eyes and walk away. Maybe she will laugh at you with her friends. But isn't that part of the game? lol. This just took the game from sport to creepy activity. Sorry. I mean it's bad enough that when you meet a guy these days, he does not even call. He wants to BBM you or IM you - total lack of proper communication skills. Now we have to put up with dating call cards? Really?

p.s. I don't roll my eyes unless you have gold teeth, cannot construct a sentence or you refer to me by some body part, or by my complexion. Take that as a hint as to what NOT to do.

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Flirting World Championships

The Three Bears...of Flirting??

Girls' night last Friday reminded me of Goldilocks and the Three Bears.

Enter our bartender/waiter aka Goldilocks - although he was a tall, chocolate, bald brother. He  started as just the bartender, which he is, but the allure of the Three Bears before him had him doing double duty.

Ahhh...the bears...

...three swanky and stunning bears -  J Bear, K Bear and Trininista Bear.

On the one hand, you had J Bear who has no real appreciation or grasp of the power...the art...the science of flirting. She does not flirt. She is very left brained; very analytical; very matter of fact. The guy brings a drink and she says thanks. lol. Even if he is waiting for a hint that he can do that thing bartenders do - to get you to spend more money - small talk, flattery, smiles, etc. Nope. She does not tease, she does not twirl the straw coyly, she does not give a little pepper and wit in her responses. No hooded eyes, no pouts. No tracing the glass with a manicured finger. Nope. She picks that drink up and ...drinks it. lol. She comes dead last in the heat.

Then you have K-Bear - a flirting maniac. I mean, she would flirt with Jesus. She takes flirting to a whole other level - where there are no boundaries and as she describes it, where it is simply "light entertainment". It is fun seeing her in action, but in the case of Goldilocks, she cast the bait, reeled him in and just when he thought he would be plopped onto the boat, she threw him back in the water. I felt really bad for the poor guy. lol. He really had high hopes. She comes first in the heat, but may be disqualified for a false start, and does not care that she is.

Then you have me - T-Bear. I flirt for fun, yes, but I still have some guidelines. I will not flirt with the old, obviously hard up 60-something expat, all alone at the end of a week-long conference, sitting next to me at the bar, maybe looking for some tropical action. K-Bear would. I think that's mean, especially if the guy has high hopes! I flirted with Goldilocks as far as was rational and kind. Poor kid - he did not need the heartbreak. However, if the prey is to my liking, my standards and fitting my criteria - well, let the games begin. I don't always see flirting as sport. Sometimes it can be, but sometimes you want it to have a purpose besides making some poor boy cry at the end of the evening. Or cultivating the beginnings of a stalker. lol. In the race, I am not last, not first, but running a comfortable race, deciding whether I want to chase down the next round of heats.

In the end, we had loads of fun. A true Sex and the City evening. Long overdue and after a tough week, well deserved.

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Leaving on a Jet Plane - The Sequel

It's been a rather hectic couple of weeks. I have been here, there and everywhere, both physically and emotionally. I spent a few lovely days out of London, some lovely afternoons in and about London, and embarked on the painful process of packing (I am surely the Imelda Marcos of clothes) and saying goodbye. Many curse words were uttered (packing) and many tears were shed.

But the adventure carries on. See you on the other side of the Atlantic.

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Why I'm a Great Catch

I was having a chat with a friend of the male variety last night, over some hummus (I love that I can just go to Tesco and buy any variety I want without having to make it myself), and he asked the million dollar question: Why are you single? Well, buddy, if I could give you an answer, I would have. I can probably say maybe it's my bad habit of rolling my eyes at men who try to impress me, or the fact that I don't tolerate nonsense, or the fact that I don't like bald or balding men which seems to be the norm here (snicker). But he did point out why I was a great catch, in his own funny "man" way.

The obvious - I'm cute. I won't go on too much about this for fear of being called vain. But I am.

Again, not going to expound but I am also smart and hella funny.

I love sports. I do. I love watching sports and going to watch sports. During the World Cup, if you are not a football fan, you are persona non grata in my life. Yes, I can appreciate the male form, but I also do appreciate the game. However, there has to be some balance as well. While I complain about my cousin watching football for hours on end, this is only because it interrupted productive student life. I also find something very pathetic about anyone who will sit for hours and hours and hours watching sports, or tv in general, when life is happening around them. It's the same way I feel about people married to their smartphones, Twitter etc. Go out...do something. But anyway, guys like a woman who not only loves sports but can appreciate THEIR love for sports. So when they are watching basketball or football, the woman understands why they don't want to snuggle at that exact moment. lol.

One of my many masterpieces

I'm a great cook. I love how he said this as he munched on store bought hummus. lol. There is immense truth in the saying, the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. I have spun my magic web around the fragile consciousness of male homosapiens just by twirling my pot spoon. I need to take greater advantage of this magic power.

I appreciate other people's space. I love having my "me" time and in the same vein, I appreciate the other person's space as well. I have seen too many girlfriends who do not give a guy a chance to breathe - always calling, nagging. My cousin had one of his typical boys' nights here and one of the girlfriends came over - uninvited. Why, honey? Don't you see there are only men here? What was even more annoying, somehow I was left to "babysit" this twit when all I wanted to do was watch my chick flick in the other room. By myself. Clinginess, on either side, is never cute.

To add to the above, I have my own interests and I am independent. Some men say they want an independent woman and then cannot deal with all that entails, but my friend pointed out that generally, the fact that I have my built a life and I am not obviously desperate to find a man is apparently attractive. My female relatives, in their sweet, old school way, would have me believe that marriage is the answer to all my problems. Getting a Master's degree and moving along in my chosen field, buying my own house, travelling - not so important to them. lol.

I am the anti-hoochie mama. Sure, I get upset and angry about stuff, but you will never see me doing a "Maury" in public or even in private. You know what a Maury is - a crazed woman who starts cussing, scratching, throwing things, having to be physically restrained from physically hurting the man. No. Or doing a Lifetime - the woman who starts crying and acting hysterical for no good reason. Yeah. That's not me. I stay pretty calm during disagreements. I think that is scarier - sitting and smiling at them, because then they go to bed with one eye open. lol. But seriously, I have crossed the threshold of teenaged behaviour. I believe there are definitely more grown-up ways of facing conflict. Yet I have seen women in my age bracket and older, who just simply act a fool, and then wonder, why the man vex!!!

All this however does not really help me at this point. But the hummus was amazing. I love hummus. Now, that's a great catch! The dude who can bring me hummus! lol.

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Great Expectations - The Reasons for Dating

Dating - what is it really?

In Trinidad, I don’t think we really use the word  date. I grew up on American television and got used to hearing about kids dating but no one ever asked me out on a date. We went out on date like things – to dinner, to the movies, etc, but I never dated anyone. It was very much hanging out, liming, going out – not dating. 

In London, people date. It’s the same thing really (or is it?) but it takes some getting used to – dating. In any event, I don’t blog much about the dating activities here, or as I prefer the going-out activities. But it’s pretty fun – not always so much for the relationship building side but more for the entertainment value. I have been introduced to new people, new places, new things. It is a great way to discover the city and meet new people for sure. Maybe not so good for love-hunting, which typically is what dates are all about, isn’t it?

It’s pretty hard to meet people here, as I have indicated before (eyes glued to the smartphone syndrome is very real here) so when you do get thrown a bone, and after determining whether the bone is suitable enough to sniff and nibble on, you make the most of it.

Tonight, I am going salsa dancing with a cute and funny guy. Maybe he will not be Mr Trininista, but we will have a laugh, for sure, especially as neither of us has ever danced salsa in our lives. As I said, in this city, I have set my expectations for love-hunting pretty low, as people generally are so detached and dare I say, some are emotionally retarded, but when it comes to entertainment – my expectations are off the charts!!!

This may not bode well for the husband hungry relatives but it’s just dandy for me at the moment.I think that's why it's so fun for me, because I have stopped having great expectations

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Single Gal Observations: Trinidad vs London

"Mums, is that your daughter? Oh gosh, like yuh take yuh time when yuh was making she".

This was a one-way conversation a random man on the street was having with my mother, as I ran ahead in my fitted jeans and platforms, to the tax office to see how many people I would need to push out of my way. In case you are confused, it was a compliment, suggesting that I was a fine specimen. lol. Trini men have special ways of saying nice things about women. This was about 5 weeks ago, when I was at home. To say I miss these random Trini man moments would be an understatement. In London, one can be virtually invisible - except to the Africans, of course. They see you in 3D, so much so they channel their inner Diana Ross and reach out and touch, much to my annoyance. Admiration - accpetable. Aggression - not so much.

But I now understand why some of these chicks don't even bother to look decent and why they wear wings on their eyelids and call them eyelashes, or pantyhose with holes, or pantyhose with no pants. Noone cares! It is clear to me now. Random strangers do not compliment you or approach you. Hell, they don't even say good morning. If they manage to pry their eyes away from their iPhones, Blackberries or Androids, they stare at you blankly, rather than in admiration. It is really very odd to me - a Trini woman used to blatant adulation and public "affection" and I admit, I loved the amusement of it all, not so much the flattery. I really miss the daily amusement and ego stroking. Thinking I am great is all well and good, but it can only go so far.

Call me spoilt, but aye...every now and then you need a little reminder that you are ON like boiled corn, especially because I am sure I have not morphed into some unsightly creature in 5 weeks!  I mean, I even went on a date the other day, and while I was not expecting the dude to fall at my feet - a little recognition would not have killed him either, especially as I was rockin' a sunny look. I mean, after you take your time to choose a cute outfit, and look fab-u-lous  - nada.

I just needed to get that off my chest, as I think about my life. lol.

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Good Men - Falling Like Rain from the Sky...or Not

Is it raining good men where you are in the world?

My overseas Masters student partner-in-crime, Gerry and I were talking earlier about how it is somehow expected that when you go abroad you are automatically expected to meet this elusive Mr Right...or whatever. When you have a conversation with well-meaning aunts, uncles, co-workers or friends, it's always "So you pick up?" - which generally is them asking if you have met anyone.

Sure. I have met plenty guys here. I am not dead. But is that the point? To amass a bucketload of anykinda men to appease the husband hungry relatives and friends in some demented and twisted way, with no thought of compatibility, sanity and chemistry? No. The point is, it has nothing to do with geography. I realise the man recession is not limited to Trinidad and Tobago - it is indeed an international phenomenon. And I don't mean recession to mean scarce in the true sense of the word. However, these well-wishers also feel I can just get dressed and open the door and voila - compatible, good men just drop from the sky - like rain!

I should probably categorically state - it is not raining good men in London either. You still have to go out and make the effort to find them. I have met all kinds and yes, some may say I am picky but a MAN told me I am not picky enough! So what do you have to say about that?

In any event, please, well-wishers, while it may seem like fun to pounce on me everytime you get me on the phone, or via email, or in person about this man from your visions, it is not fun for me to have to hear the same questions over and over again. Furthermore, I am not singular in this man-a-thon. There are millions of me out there, so maybe you can ask them too!

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The Latest Dating Hot Spots

Love and marriage?

While having drinks last weekend, and somehow spoiling a good day with talk about my dissertation, my girlfriend mentioned that her friend had actually met her husband while doing her dissertation. Yes. She too was conducting interviews in and around London, and met the man she would marry during one of these interviews.

Needless to say, my luck is never that great when it comes to single girl adventures and wedding planners around the world can breathe a sigh of relief. It ain't gonna happen here. My single girl adventures are usually heinous. However, I will admit, today's interviewee was as close to hot as I am probably going to get during this dissertation exercise. Not only was he cute and well dressed, but friendly - nothing better than that. But there was also a very large gold band on the ring finger - not that I was looking or anything. It was just rather large. :)

So where does one meet single guys anymore? It seems as though one can meet people anywhere these days - be it on the train, in the jerk chicken shop (personal story...lol), in the vegetable aisle, or online. Cosmo ranks the top 10 places women can meet men. Among them are the Apple Store, the gym, political rallies and grad school coffee shops. Hmmm...

• I can cross out grad school coffee shops immediately - at least MY grad school coffee shop. FAIL.
• The Apple Store? Really? While this is definitely a man hub, are the men inside an Apple store really focusing on anything other than the gadgets in the Apple store? Do women even compute while they are focused on the bright lights of iPads and the like? And personally speaking, being a non-gadgety person myself, and not a slave to every new trend, I am not sure this is the type of guy I would want in my life. 
• The gym. Been there, done that. No. I have found that the guys at gyms think they are hot shit and thus think they can get any girl in the place and most of the times do. Who wants a sweaty, "think he's all dat" weight room playa?
• Political rallies. Unless it is a non-TT political rally, not interested. If it is a UNC or PNM rally, forget it. Not interested. 

While I am enjoying the many ways of running into man candy here in London, be it over drinks, while trying to open your front door, on the bus, over carrots in the veggie aisle, or over a box of jerk chicken, the question still remains - where have you met your guy or where would you recommend for the single ladies of 2011? 

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Love is Bigger than a Box of Chocolates

It's been another tedious weekend. I finished my assignment at 9.30am or so. I was cooking this morning at 2am. Showering and then cleaning my room at 5am. It's crazy. I am now settled in bed with True Grit as part of my Sunday decompression and a glass of wine.

I guess everyone is excited for Valentine's Day tomorrow but it's just another day for retailers to dig out people eye (Trini spk). I am sure I will be bombarded by roses and chocolates on the trains tomorrow afternoon, which is fine. It's just the PDAs I can do without out.

But I am a really solid believer that if you're going to spend money to prove you love someone, which in itself is really ridiculous, do it so it helps someone else. Join (RED) has some really fantastic brand partners, and awesome red products which will be perfect for your honey, and help in the fight against HIV/AIDS as well.




Visit http://www.joinred.com/ and support love, AND the fight against HIV/AIDS
These were my top picks for Valentine's Day


I love that these are products people may actually want to be seen in - by established brands. It's often hard for causes to gain traction when the novelty items are cheap and irrelevant to daily life. That may sound awful but I prefer to donate my time or just the funds to a cause, rather than have an entire drawer filled with cheap knick knacks I will never use.  My dad falls for it every time - he has loads of seashell ornaments and homemade cards at home. Cute and sentimental but clutter. Take the money, keep the gift.

But what is hotter than a red Amex card (well, besides a black Amex card), or a red Netbook or that hot ruby faced Emporio Armani watch? Knowing that your money is going towards something worthwhile.

As usual, noone pays me to plug these things - they should - but in this case, it's a freebie. I am loving those Emporio Armani sunglasses like woah.

Love to everyone. Not at full capacity today.

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I am a Hot, Doggy Mess

 

Richard Gere and the little Akita pup, in Hachi

I always put the tv on when having a meal. I usually put it on on BBC or a channel I know I would not get glued to, so when I am done eating I can get back to work. But it was still on one of the movie channels after I watched the end of Valentine's Day this morning (go figure) and Hachi - A Dog's Tale was on. Anyone who knows me knows I absolutely love dogs. And there has not been a dog movie yet that has not made me cry. So I said to myself after sitting with my sandwich and my apple pie - bad idea, bad idea, bad idea, bad idea, bad idea.

But it was too late. I always already glued to it. And I was hooked. And like every other dog movie, I bawled. It is really something else - the genre that never fails to make me cry. I sat there crying over my apple pie - no, bawling. Thank God I was home alone. The movie was so sad. Oh my gosh. If you have not seen it yet, do! Really incredible and based on a true story. Hachi also reminded me of my own dog who we lost some time ago. It's just bloody sad all round, dammit. I am now a flaming hot mess, and need to probably go read the news or about Lindsay Lohan to make me all cynical and bitter again so I can get on with it.

Why can't people be like dogs? When women say men are dogs, it is such an insult to the dog, because they are loving and loyal creatures.

I really miss having a dog.

Going to compose myself and get back to work. I may be back but really had to share.

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Kinky? Nerdy? Crazy? What's YOUR Love Niche?

I'm hoping that the sneezing and sniffles which have been plaguing me since yesterday are the result of some sort of allergy. I would hate to think that it was the cold or flu again. Not again.

So I have decided to do some fun stuff around one of the most ridiculous days in the year - Valentine's Day. And I happened to run across an iVillage slideshow about love niche sites - sites that cater for whatever your fetish may be when it comes to love.

• So you may be looking for a sugar daddy, then this site is for you.
• Some women love the sound of a man with an accent, specifically, the British accent. Look no further, just go here to meet the British bloke of your dreams.
• Or you may be a cancer survivor whose victory over the disease scares some men off. There is an actual site for cancer survivors and the men/women who will love them no matter what. 
• Lately, though my personal "preference" if you may, is the sugar daddy type (lol), I seem to be unconsciously channelling my inner cougar. However, I will not be visiting this site. 
• Maybe you're a single mother, whose kids are a major turn off for prospective suitors. Then, visit this site, where men don't care that you come with "baggage" in the form of cute cherubs.

Photo: Pittsburgh Post Gazette

But the piece de resistance, even after seeing sites for women who want a man in uniform, or a love matches for tree huggers, the winner of them all was the site - Meet An Inmate. I kid you not. Meet An Inmate. Meet a frickin' inmate!!!!

Across America or the world for that matter, there are men and women lonely enough to register a profile to meet a convicted felon. Who does this? I mean, sure...everyone needs love, but really?  The profiles on this site are great. One guy's profile photo is from when he was clearly in his 20s but his listed age is 65 - hmmm...does not sound like he's in there for grand larceny! Life sentence perhaps? Watch Law and Order much? Oh, but wait...he's eligible for parole soon. Lucky you.

But I won't even lie to you - I know someone who met a man who was in prison and planned on marrying him so she could stay in the U.S lol. This world we live in - so damn amusing. So if you're hard up and really on the brink on Monday, find your love niche! lol. You never know who may be out there in a retirement home, high school or a holding cell, waiting...for you.

Check out the complete slideshow here because there were lots more.

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Dating a Sports Star

During one of my assignment breaks this afternoon, I sat down to catch up on the Commonwealth Games, now taking place in New Delhi, India. So far, my countrymen have snagged 2 silver and 2 bronze medals. Very proud of my little island. Then during one of the commercial breaks I switched channels and there was something I had never seen in all my life and I pictured dating a guy and bringing him home to meet my sports-loving father and the conversation with my dad going something like this:

Me: Hey dad. This is my new boyfriend.
Daddy: So what do you do?
Boyfriend: Into sports, sir.
Daddy: Oh really? I love sports. Used to play cricket, and I love football, track and shit like boxing too. So you play football?
Boyfriend: No.
Daddy: Oh, you run track? What are you? Sprinter or long distance runner? Or maybe you're into field events? Long jump?
Boyfriend: No. None of those.
Daddy: Cricket?
Boyfriend: No sir.
Daddy: So what the ass do you do?
Boyfriend: I am a trampolinist.
Daddy: A what?
Boyfriend: I am a national trampoline champion.
Daddy: Chile, get this man outta mih house and doh bring him back until he plays a REAL sport.

There it was. The UK National Trampoline Finals on my tv. I was laughing so hard I thought I would pee myself. I mean, I was certain there would be no black men in this ting. It has to be the most stupid thing I had ever heard of. Grown men and women jumping up and down on a trampoline for sport. Okay, so they were doing turns and twists and stuff, but really? A whole sport?

In other news, I found it a wee bit hilarious that as I got on the train heading to Waterloo a little after 7 this this morning, after a housewarming party last night, I still managed to pull a textbook out of my bag and read all the way in to London, despite a night of drinks, friends and dancing. There is something wrong with that image, isn't there?

What's more wrong than that image? Sitting here on a Saturday night with 6 books and countless journal articles open on my task bar, instead of being out in the West End drinking something fruity and rummy. I did manage to leave the house briefly to head down to my local Sainsbury's and get a dinner for 2 deal of paella, some veggies in white wine with shallot butter, a bottle of pinot grigio and dessert for just £10. Because yet again, I had to cancel all weekend activity, which included a wedding out of the city, and a dinner date, for school work, so had to bring the weekend to me. It was the best meal I had all week. For in-house food, it's pretty awesome stuff. What would I ever do without pre-packaged meal deals?

And it's going to be a long night of reading, assimilating, writing and theorising, so watch this space.

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Date Night

As if I were not annoyed enough about having to spend my one free Friday on campus, and then leaving afer 7pm, a dude decided he would try to get snippy and I really was not feeling the attitude. So we had made tentative plans for tomorrow but because I was not sure whether I would need to have a team meeting on Saturday, I could not confirm a time with him immediately. I sent him a text telling him I would confirm this evening after our meeting. He texts me last night, clearly in some kinda rush and I told him again, I would let him know for sure on Friday evening. I mean, if you had something you wanted to plan, just let me know. I could have planned for another day, but he responded that this was cool. As I am leaving campus after working for hours,and deciding that my Saturday had to be mine and not school's, I text him back to tell him what time would work for me. This is the text this bright man sent me:

Hey sorry thought it was evening now so have made plans.

I mean, wow. I was being schooled in when was evening. Can I just say I came here for a Masters degree and not for a distinction in Debrett's etiquette lesson. WTF.

Add annoyance, extreme hunger and cold, and I was not at all impressed with this f..r. So if he thought he was being cheeky, well he clearly had no idea who the arse he was dealing with. Trust me, this not-so-stunning ass knows now. All I will say is, there will be no date tomorrow or ever, and he has not responded. lol.

Instead I seem to have a date with 2 Marketing texts and a PowerPoint presentation and at this present time with a glass of a very nice Shiraz. At least they don't talk back.

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For Sale: Love, Sex and Marriage

A friend shared this video with me and besides the obvious hilarity of it (only a Trini has this kinda time to waste...lol) it really is an amusing reflection of a segment of the local dating scene. In fact, it is not so uncommon in other places either. A dude buys you a drink and though after having to pay for my own drink at a party once, and recognising just how expensive cocktails can be, a $30 drink does not equal commitment.

I saw an episode of Oprah once where a grown woman, I mean a woman in her 50s, was asking Oprah whether it was expected that after a man paid for dinner, that she should sleep with him. I am not sure where this whole material barter thing started - food or drink for sex - but I would hope that more women would appreciate that they are worth more than a plate of ribs or a beer, like my puppet friend in the video. True, some women up the ante and barter sex and companionship for more expensive things like a house, car, trips etc, giving rise to the sugar daddy syndrome, which I support, tongue in cheek. lol. But is love - be it physical or the whole deal - really on sale?

 I just loved the video and wanted to share it. I have a myriad of things I need to do today and I think I should go take a shower.

I have also added some of my favourite products to my Amazon widget, located on the top left of the bloggy blog, so check them out. You may want to order something. I will be changing them out regularly.

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Fluffy socks time in London

So I am in London. The million hour flight from Port of Spain did not feel so long this time, despite the fact that I still managed to get myself a tantie, i.e. an aged woman who likes to chat, as a seatmate. Luckily for me, tantie was travelling with her son so she did most of her chatting with him. The hot male seatmate - nada. But the creepy, married dude next to me - annoying. This dude kept looking at me, while his fat wife snored her life away next to him. He even decided he would start a game of synchronised peeing because everytime I needed to use the loo, there he was right next to me. Though I do not encourage it, if a man is going to go through all this drama to mack on a woman, then say something - start a conversation. Don't just hope the woman is so impressed by your dogged persistence aka stalking.

So it's 1.30am in London and you ask, why is she awake, blogging? After doing some grocery shopping, then grocery eating and then reuniting, I fell asleep around 6pm and woke up at midnight, so here I am. The boy got me at the airport (looking all sexy) and I have free reign of the house until Sunday, when my cousin gets back, and when I put on my best cricketing outfit and go to some cricket thing-a-ma-jig.

I am usually one of those vacationers who is up and about from the word "go" but this time around, between old age, cold breeze and sheer exhaustion after a rough couple of weeks, the plan tomorrow is to sit on the couch in my purple fluffy socks and eat British cherries and Haagen Dazs with my finger on the remote control buttons. You don't realise just how tired you are, until you actually get some rest and have nothing else to do but rest. I will do my adventuring the next day. Next week - Europe adventuring. I have high hopes for sun, and other things.

Not sure where the picture card reader is on this laptop so no photos of my fluffy socked feet for you tonight. But take my word for it, they're cute. Oh and I want to give the Brits a crash course in what summer is - this ain't it. (hence the fluffy socks)

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