The Selfie Stick - The Darkest Point in Humanity

The selfie stick at work. Steups.
Photo credit: The Telegraph

Let's just get right down to it. The selfie stick. It is possibly one of the most polarising contraptions out there right now. You either love it, or hate it. So what is it?

I love Urban Dictionary!

Selfie Stick 
- An extendable stick you can put your phone on so you can take a selfie from farther away.
- An elongated rod, usually made out of plastic or steel, with a camera on one end and a dense moron on the other

Others have also referred to the selfie stick as the Staff of Narcissus and my favourite was British journalist, Grace Dent who described them as "one of the darkest points in humanity".

Yet to some, the selfie stick is a moment in history - a greater discovery than the coffee bean, electricity or air-conditioning. Yep. Being able to enhance one's selfies for Facebook, Twitter and Instagram is the reason they sleep better at night.

I did some more research into this phenomenon and there are three basic kinds of Narcissistick...sorry...selfie stick.

• The sticks that are Bluetooth-enabled, which pair with your iPhone or Android phone and let you press a button on the handle to take a photo. 
• The sticks that plug into your smartphone’s headphone jack, which also let you take a photo with the press of a button on the handle. 
• Sticks that come without any remote triggering function; some of these are sold as a package deal with a keychain-sized Bluetooth remote. (source: QZ.com)

Now I love me a selfie and if one morning I think I look extra cute, better believe I am taking a freakin' selfie. Not on my soapbox when it comes to selfies - selfies can be great. But, what is this selfie stick business? I have a problem with this - people walking around with a stick to take selfies? C'mon man.

Now from a travelling perspective, and as a solo traveller, I completely understand how challenging it can be to document some of your moments on a life-changing global discovery. You stand in front of that monument you reaaaaaaally want to get a photo of - with you in it - and then do the tourist 'bait and release ' where you size up the other tourists or locals passing by and decide who looks friendly enough, or at the very least, the least surly, so you can ask them to take that photo for you.

Nowadays, with smartphones with flip cameras and so on, the vacation selfie has sometimes replaced the charity photo from fellow tourists. I have still not jumped on the vacation selfie train completely. I still like the old fashioned tourist beg because they are often much better photos, if you are a seasoned campaigner and know how to choose your volunteer photographer, and I still like having 1-minute meet and greets with strangers who may be just like me, or not. That's part of the beauty of travelling, for me.

But I will admit, I am not a lover of the selfie stick. Though I get how it could benefit me as a solo traveller in particular, I feel an overwhelming distaste for it. I am so glad many museums and other such places have seen fit to ban their use. It is already hard battling with overzealous tourists trying to take selfies in front of everything, including that painting you want to take a closer look at. Add a 3-foot stick to the mix, and a few hundred...thousand tourists to that, and it is a nightmare.

This would drive me crazy!

Not to mention, people seem to be whipping out these things any and everywhere. There has to be some risk of physical harm as people walk around with these things threatening to poke you in the eye or in the guts. Not to mention the plain old inconvenience of it.

There was the guy in Rio de Janeiro waiting to go up the Sugarloaf Mountain cable car. His gigantic selfie stick kept getting caught in the vinyl ceiling of the waiting area and then inconvenienced other passengers inside the already-cramped cable car. - TreeHugger.com

But of course it speaks to a deeper malaise -the ever pervasive need to be viewed, to be 'liked', to create this world where everything about us and around us is perfect. Where every single thing is a photo opportunity and a chance to get 100 likes on Instagram and get more likes than the photo taken before or your friend's photo. Where you end up becoming more focused on the photo's potential on your social media than on the actual moment.

I’ll never forget the woman at a spectacular northeastern beach who never took her eyes off her extended cell phone, carefully wading into the warm turquoise ocean while holding her selfie stick at the perfect angle. She posed, smiled, angled her head, posed again. Not once did she put down her stick to actually swim in the water - Treehugger.com

Co-sign!
Photo credit: The Telegraph

If this is your thing though, more power to you. I won't wade up to a woman like this and tell her don't do it. That is her business. I will possibly snicker and roll my eyes and blog about it, but it is her right to look like an idiot.

Where I do have a problem is if that selfie stick is going to challenge ME! - if it is going to block my view of my experience, be totally invasive during my moment, or just simply physically be a nuisance.

So kudos to some of my favourite places like the National Gallery and the Chateau de Versailles for banning the selfie stick to ensure everyone can enjoy the treasures which these venues offer to visitors.

Sadly I am hearing that selfie drones may soon be inflicted upon us. At that point I think I may just retreat into self-imposed exile from the world.

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Flirting 1.0 in a 2.0 world

I have on occasion on this blog described the Trini courting methods - maybe not in great detail but I have, like I did here. In case you needed a reminder, one such encounter went like this -

Scene: Trininista walking down the streets of Port of Spain, during her lunch break, looking cute as always, albeit a little aggravated cause the Third World pavements are destroying my Manhattan bought shoes, and threatening to give me a sprained ankle. A man is walking in the opposite direction, towards the 'nista. He is leering in that Trini way. Smiling. His lips curve as he prepares to speak, no doubt about to utter some lame line about my figure or my complexion. I roll my eyes behind my sunglasses and ready my lips, tongue and teeth to release the loud sucking sound Trinis call a "steups".

Man: Baby, you look good. I wanna ride you like Seabiscuit.

Steups averted. It was so funny I made sure I was out of his sight before I laughed aloud. It is a line that I have placed as my #1 pickup line ever!

Fast-forward to the technology age. Now I have weird men offering to chat me up on Facebook, as I have complained on countless occasions on my wall, and to friends whose "thirsty" friends spot my cuteness on a comment or a "like" and feel it is a free-for-all on the friend requests. Now I also have random men stalking me even on Twitter. How do you stalk someone on Twitter? I am not sure but it must take a special (idle) type of person. In any event, a few weeks ago, on my other handle - my professional handle - a young man sent me a DM, not just chatting me up, but extending the cyber assault by offering his BBM pin.

BBM fever

Two problems with this, Mr Twitterati-Flex:

1. I love the sound of the human voice. I mean, what is it now with people and all these gadgets and texting and BBMing and malarkey? Does anyone even know how to make a phone call anymore? Call me old fashioned, but I love a good old phone call. A few months ago, a guy, who should have known better cause he knew me well enough by then, tried to plan a date with me via text and email. He did not hear from me and never once thought, maybe I should call. Nope. He was depending solely on this email which I could not, or would not access cause I was out. Sorry but I only access emails on my laptop. I spend enough time on this as it is. I am not going to sit online via my phone as well. So he waited and waited, getting no answer from me, and then sent me a text. "What's happening later? I sent an email". A phone call would have solved all his dating problems. I thought maybe this was an English thing but I know it is becoming a global communication phenomenon. It irks me.

As for Mr BBM, I mean, if he had asked me for my Skype, he may have had a chance (.0000001 of a chance), but my BBM pin? Really? Which brings me to point #2.

2. I do not currently own a Blackberry or any type of smartphone. I know this makes me a social and technological pariah, but I don't want to be one of those hamsters on the platform, with eyes glued to the screens of a phone. While I can access all things internet on my piece of crap Samsung, I don't. Trinis love the art of maccoing aka minding other people's business. Being in London, the city of the seemingly indifferent, has not changed that. I always on the lookout for something interesting from homosapiens. That's the fun part of life.

I feel like all these gadgets, while great on many levels, also retard socialisation and I must admit, I resent it.

Needless to say, the young man never got a response. I do not respond to Facebook, Twitter or BBM flirting. Fun fact for today. I cannot believe I am saying this, but I much prefer random men in the street and their Seabiscuit analogies. At least it is in 3D and live surround sound.

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140 characters will never be enough...

Retweeted the truth this afternoon:

Step away from social media. Real life is more important.

I am online a lot only cause I am on my laptop a lot. I am currently in the throes of the joys of interview transcription and God knows I could use a distraction from that.  But I don't have this overwhelming sensation to tweet all day or do a gazillion challenges or try every new thing. Sometimes I actually get bored with it. Honestly. Sometimes I don't want to blog, or tweet or update. The days I don't want to blog, I don't blog. And it's okay to not want to. I think it's great when you don't force it or make it happen because you think someone will miss it. I am sure noone misses it. I love going out, having a life and maybe blogging about it. I don't blog about everything I do either. Hardly. I love the convenience of online interaction, but cherish the richness of offline adventures and relationships, without the intrusion of online tricks.

I wrote this last year in  my other blog:

I remember the days when you could go to dinner with your girlfriends or go to the mall or take a nap, without a camera phone in your face. You would get home and not have to worry that already you had been tagged by Mary in 8 photos. Life used to be so simple then. You socialised without socialising. That is, you went out and enjoyed the concept of going out and catching up and having a good time and did not get lost in the tomorrow of "I need to share this with my network" or "This will make a great profile photo". These days Facebook does not even need an invitation or to RSVP. It's the ultimate stormer, wedding crasher and boldfaced guest...

...I don't sit at the dinner table with my smartphone checking tweets or emails. I like looking into the faces of friends and hearing their laughter and being wholly part of the moment. And if I don't have tons of photos to remember the occasion, or some means to let my network know that the steak was spectacular, that's okay. 

It really is. Okay. I love this video as well. Is this you?

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