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Now while I do love me some social networking – some Facebookin’, some tweetin’, some bloggin’ – I am still always a bit challenged when it comes to taking all that into the offline space. For example, I remember going to try a new restaurant, and pulling my phone out to capture the food the moment it was placed in front of me, and I remember being very aware that I probably looked pretty stupid, and looked like THAT girl taking photos of her food. In fact, I tried to take the photo on the down low, looking around to see if anyone was watching my smartphone antics, even taking the flash off to avoid being spotted. Lol.
I always feel a bit invasive if I pull out my phone in a restaurant or at an event. While I do indeed take the occasional photo for the blog, I still don’t capture a whole lot of stuff which I am sure would make my blog awesome. I love other blogs that have all those wonderful moments, and yes, we often do live vicariously through those recorded moments, but I am still grappling with the balance between recording the moments and living the moments.
I used to joke about life in London, when on the train, the hamsters would have their eyes dead set on the screens of their phones, oblivious to life around them. At a recent event here in Trinidad, I felt that sense of déjà vu where I sat in a room, at a great event, with great people, and there was a smartphone in every hand, and several pairs of eyes and minds were lost in cyberspace – Instagramming the food, tweeting about the drinks, checking in to the venue, but not really enjoying the food, enjoying the drinks, or enjoying the real people in the room at that moment.
We go out and we sit with the phones within our reach, stalking it for that beep, that shrill, that flashing light indicating a message, an email, a tweet, a comment, while there are a myriad of great things maybe happening at the table. It’s what I would describe as being socially anti-social – we are social in the 2013 sense of the word, but in truth, there is an element of distracted, insular, selfish behavior every time we bow our heads to “socialise” on our phones in the company of others.
I am not perfect. I very often fail at dinners or events when I check in or whatsapp a friend a photo, or what have you. But more and more, I am challenging myself to leave the phone in my bag and just enjoy the moment for what it is. I don’t always succeed, but hey…
I can totally relate to this post and I'm sure many others will too. I am definitely "that girl" that takes food pictures and post them whilst in a restaurant alone. But in my defense I always put my phone away if I'm dining or hanging out wit others. Its so easy to get lost in the social networking world and I do have to make a concerted effort to talk not type.
ReplyDeleteGreat Post!!
I am so glad I am not alone in this. :-)
DeleteI love this post, even though it was like a dagger to my heart. I am SO guilty of not being in the moment and living through my social media. It's terrible!
ReplyDeleteAnd if we do not set boundaries, Karen, it will only get worse.
DeleteI've done the same thing before, trying to be all sneaky about taking a picture of my food at a restaurant. You can just sense all the disapproving people staring at you in disgust! But, yes, I've been trying to do the same thing, putting the phone away and actually socializing in real life.
ReplyDeleteLOL. Yes. I am the undercover sista at the dinner table with the camera, unless it is in a room with a bunch of food bloggers, and even then, I am sometimes overwhelmed by the foodarazzi.
DeleteGuilty guilty and now as my kids are copying me I feel more guilty. The rate with which my phone became my everything left me little if not time to set boundaries. Time to regroup and pull back I think. Leave the phone home sounds rebellious almost.
ReplyDeleteOh don't let the kids follow suit. Then the whole world becomes hopeless. lol. Thanks for stopping by.
DeleteThis is so true and killing the art of conversation (as well as spelling) Hi from ShareFest
DeleteMy husband and I don't have smartphones--for financial reasons--but honestly, I like the benefit of NOT having too-easy access to the internet and technology. Sometimes it can be hurtful to go out for lunch with someone and they constantly ignore you in favor of their phone. I never want to be that person to someone else.
ReplyDeleteThat is how I am starting to think about it cause I realise it annoys me when people do it to me so I don't want to do it to anyone else anymore.
DeleteI don't think there's anyone with a smart phone that isn't guilty of this! I'm learning to just leave my phone in the other room, or buried in my purse instead of keeping it in my pocket. *Although* I have managed to snap some cute photos of my kids because a camera was so handy :) Found you via SITS this morning!
ReplyDeleteThanks for visiting Nicole. I am going to try to keep the phone in the purse when I am out.
DeleteGreat article! I have 5 teens and pre-teens at home, and my husband and I have a ground rule in our home that the phones go up and away for dinner. Unfortunately, as the kids are getting older and have jobs, sports, social life, etc - those sit-down dinners have dwindled down to Sunday dinners, but nonetheless... no phones allowed. Surprisingly, nobody really complains. I'm sure that - given the option - they'd rather be allowed to have their electronics at the dinner table, but I believe that we are a closer-knit family in part because of the bonding time that comes from sometimes saying... turn it off; let's talk to each other. I chuckled at your mention of trying to discreetly take a picture of your plate at a restaurant... because I have done the very same. ;)
ReplyDeleteWe are undercover foodarazzi, Tonya! lol. Thanks for stopping by.
DeleteI am an avid tweeter, I don't care for fb, and I LOVE to blog... BUT I am fully capable of separating real life from online. I've been needing to upgrade my cell & haven't... and I don't miss it. I keep my laptop at home when I'm out. And I get irritated w/ those who only text or msg either email or fb. IDC what "age" this is... Some call me ol' school, but I truly believe that there is life outside of online & those who don't make an effort to meet me there aren't a part of mine. *shrug* But... that's just me. I'm sure MANY can relate to your post, though. ;-) It also has made a difference because I canNOT take a cell into work w/ me. I go 12-16 hours every day w/out it.
ReplyDeleteNothing at all wrong with old school. I miss things like phone calls for example. Everyone is content to tweet-vite you to things or FB-invite, whatsapp-invite - they check up on you via their smartphone keyboards rather than making a call. That irks me. I still call people. I am old school like that.
DeleteThis is so funny. Just today we were on a hayride and my friend behind me instagram need a pic and tagged me. I liked it a few seconds later. We both started laughing at how silly it was.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you 100% about sometimes being too absorbed in our phones to notice the important moments in front of us. I'm guilty of this on occasion but I do try to be more focused on the here and now rather than be determined to Tweet, Facebook, or Instagram everything. Definitely not perfect but I'm at least aware...most of the time. LOL
ReplyDeleteI used to be really bad about trying to capture every moment with my phone camera, but then I realized how much I was missing out on. I have been keeping it in my purse more and more often. Thanks for sharing your perspective at ShareFest.
ReplyDeleteGreat article...Guilty and Guilty. It take some conscious effort, a dead battery and some great friends sometimes to just let be!!! Lovely post!
ReplyDeleteI'm definitely trying to walk the balance between using my phone as a tool and using it as a distraction. Love, love, love the sign from the restaurant! Visiting from Sharefest.
ReplyDeleteI love to be online but I don't like to be online when I'm in the company of people.
ReplyDeleteI tend to ignore my phone completely unless I get a call from my daughter or mom..
Everyone else gets the shut down.
That's just how I am...!
Visiting from #sitssharefest
Keep it Touched,
KG
www.kgstyleinc.com
"Socially anti-social," I like that. It's sad but true. I find myself talking to my son while looking at my phone. My mother would have my head if she saw that. I need to live more and post less like you say.
ReplyDeleteIt's blogging that has really turned me into to a social media/ email addict. When I'm not connected, sharing, commenting, my stats suffer.
ReplyDelete